Different people obviously have different ways of doing things with the same goal.
Day by day I realized that not everyone laughing at others jokes, understand others intention or see things the way others see it.
As for today, I would like to write about my little history of these 20 years of my life.
I was born, at least for me in a very complete and comfortable family. I'd got parents, brothers, sisters, grandparents, uncles, aunts and even a 100 year old greatgrandmother which I call 'Onyang'. I was not from a rich family as many thought I was. But still for me, it's enough. I love my house where the space is just enough. Nor too big neither too small. I only stayed at my house during the weekend because during school days, I stayed with my grandparents. Why is that so? Because my grandparents' house are really big and they said please left their grandchildren with them. (my mom's side) So my dad agree and as long as we were still in primary school, we must stayed with our grandparents. So basically, I was a 'Kampung Girl'. I was really like a princess, being treated so well by my Atok and Wan. But I do love adventure so, I was very active in Scout and sport. My days were just great till one day when I was 11, my beloved Onyang passed away. That day I realized, things just not gonna be the same throughout your whole life.
As I grew up and entered my secondary school, I lived with my parents. I did applied for boarding schools but it's just not my fate to be there. I was also being accepted to two famous Islamic schools in my area but to some circumstances, I didn't go. So I attended a daily school which I loved to call it 'royal school'. Here, my real training started. What training? Readers, you'd got to figure it yourself. :)
In my new school, I knew nobody while the others mostly are from the same school and already friends. So, I told myself, 'You've gotta find friends!'. So, my first batch of friends are all Chinese. I learned the way the think and get to know their culture. During this time, I only speak english even with my Mom. (well, she's an English teacher.) Only the end of the year, I started to get closed with the Malays.
Then, my tuition (extra class with private pay) life started. I was sent to a total Chinese tuition class with a very strict teacher, Mr. Goh. I understand nothing and I did nothing to make myself understand. One day, Mr. Goh found out and I was being scold harshly. He even said, I don't deserve to be in his class. Due to his words, I promised that I'll show him who I am. Thanks to him, every single test and examination in my Science and Mathematics for those 3 years were flying colors.
The next year, I started to involved actively in sports and clubs. I started my hockey lesson and I really felt in love with hockey. Every evening, my Dad sent me to my training session with a piece of advice, 'If you are studying, do it well. And if you are playing, do it well too.'. He encouraged me as he was a former hockey player and also a coach. He was so proud of his school time in STAR (a very famous boarding school in Malaysia). But then, as my exam result is not convincing, my Mom asked me to stop and I did.
Then I made myself involved with Police Cadet where I represent my zone to state for 2 respective years. I also was too busy with other activities till it effect my English result. Why English? I was not so sure. I was sent to two different English tuition. And again, I was sent to a total Chinese tuition class with a very patient teacher, Mr. Siew. Being alienated because I'm different? So not new to me. There, I learnt a new thing. People would establish your existence once you were good in English. So I brushed up my English and as the result, I gained friends.
My second English tuition are just 30 minutes after the first one. And how do you think I could manage it? Maghrib prayer, eat, go to second tuition class in 30 minutes. Well, I ate in the car. As I reached home, I pray then went to tuition. No rest! These were my routine every week.
After PMR, I stayed at my beloved school. Wanna know what, I was still an ordinary student without any position. For me, I don't run after the prefect position because I don't wanna be labelled as useless, hopeless prefect where I could easily find in my school. Besides, I always not in school due to my activities so, if I were a prefect, I would definitely burden my colleague.
As I entered form four (16 years old), I left all the adventures activities and involved myself to a total new things which were leadership and literature, Malay literature. In the same year, I attended both of leadership and literature camp. I was chosen to represent my state for both of these camp. Through these camps, I learnt more about teamwork and how to handle stubborn member.
Then again, I need another tuitions. Of course, my Mom sent me again to those previous type of tuitions and again and again every procedure repeated. During my form five, I left all those activities that required me to be outside of school. I want to make my family proud of my SPM result and of course for me to repay my own tears, sweat and blood. So I turned down every offer from my teachers. We are just human being, (a problem came up and I guess it's too private to be told here) how we plan are not always what happened. That problem also required my attention and my life during this stage were so hectic. Alhamdulillah, few months before SPM, everything was settled.
Now, here I am in another total new environment. Again.. :) I really thanked my Mom for all the things that she did for me. She did it for future. Trained her daughter to survived wherever I were sent. That's why we said, Mom knows the best. Just before I left my hometown, my sister make me realise of a thing,
'Mom do give you the most difficult way.'
'Why?'
'Your Iphone 5'
'What with it?'
'You yourself don't realize how far you have gone and how much you have did. She only give you a really big reward now. After A-Level.'
And yes, now I know why I don't like to get things easily. It's because I was trained to. TRAINED TO. Mom, I do things not to get reward. That's what you always taught me and maybe like me, you also don't realise it. And my one and only Iphone 5 are different than others. The sentimental value is what it counts.
Thank you Mom, for all the things that you've done. This open minded, young woman will turn 20 tomorrow and because of you, Rosnah Hasan this 20 years were the great lessons of life ever. Don't worry. Nothing and no one can cover your little star from shining as your star have received a direct sunlight from the sun. InshaAllah. And that's what you have worked out all these while. I'll continue to see things in my very own definition and stay positive! I love you Mom!
p/s: my Mom will send me back to tuition back, after reading this, I guess.
My story is not as great as our Prophet Nabi Muhammad S.A.W or as wonderful as his friends or a thick cool journal of Tun Mahathir but I do hope this little history of mine will motivate others to go through their life without any negative value or regret.
